Christopher

Chris is Ashley’s twin brother. He’s of course our eldest nephew and also 19. He’s always had problems, as long as I’ve known him. I’m quite positive he suffers from some sort of severe learning disability or perhaps even some sort of psychosis. Sadly, his parents have just pushed this under the carpet for years and never got him any help. To make matters worse, they homeschooled him, which I have no doubt, did nothing to help him progress mentally or otherwise.

I’ve always wished there was something more I could do to help Chris but Brian has never had the patience to deal with him and I hardly feel it is my place to intervene. Now that he is nearly 20 and his father has all but washed his hands of him, Chris is a time bomb. He says that he wants to better his life but he refuses to get a full time job, finish the work involved in getting his GED or really take help or advice from anyone that offers it aside from his Great Grandmother (Grandma Johnson) who he stays with when he’s not staying with his 17 year old girlfriend and her family.

Although I haven’t seen it for myself, all signs point to him not being very grateful of his grandma putting him up and that he abuses the privilege at every turn. He’s desperate for the attention and the approval of anyone who will give it, in particular his family and friends but he lies and steals and constantly tries everything in his power to impress you when all anyone wants is for him to just be himself.

He sort of invited himself over a few weeks ago. It was the first time I’d seen him in ages. He wants us to treat him like an adult but he can’t hang. Maybe we gave him a little too hard a time but he’s gotta learn to swallow his pride and be a man. The moment Jim mentioned his underage girlfriend he stormed out.

A week later he called to ask to come over but Brian and I weren’t really feeling like babysitting so we didn’t answer our phones. Maybe that was a mistake. Maybe I should just have had the gall to answer the phone and tell him I’m sorry but we’re busy but I didn’t. I figured when he called my phone, and Brian’s phone 4 times a piece and we didn’t answer, he’d take a hint but no, instead he decided to come over and knock on our door. We didn’t answer and he called Jim’s phone. Jim didn’t answer and Chris immediately called again. This time Jim answered and he wasn’t nice. He told Chris he didn’t appreciate him blowing up our phones and if we wanted to talk to him we’d have picked up.

Chris was obviously upset but it’s beyond frustrating that he can’t take a hint. Part of me wants to take him out to lunch and have a serious conversation with him but from everything I’ve heard from the rest of his family, he won’t listen. In fact I’m starting to think if I took his GED test for him, gave him a job and place to live and counseling sessions he either wouldn’t take any of it or he’d find a way to fuck it all up. He seems determined to bite the hand that feeds him and I for one do not want to get bit.

My heart just breaks for him because I know so much of this is not his fault. He’s got issues he was probably born with and he’s really gotten a raw deal in life thus far but the thing is, I know what it’s like to get a raw deal. My deal wasn’t great but it wasn’t so bad either, however I ran with the “bad” kids in high school and most of them have pasts so bad that they make Christopher’s look like a trip to Disneyland. Now some of them couldn’t get out of that downward spiral of self-pity and loathing and they ended up dead or worse but the ones that made did so because they knew they couldn’t sit there with their heads in their hands crying about how life dealt them a bad hand. They had to get up and they put it behind them and they fought hard to make something of themselves.

*sigh* Perhaps I should try and put some effort into Chris. I just know I’ll hate myself if something happens to him and I never really gave it a shot. Damn stupid conscience.